Back in europe

Culturally Belgium could not bemore of a contrast to India, arriving in Brussels I was instantly greeted by misty cold weather, people without a proper knowledge English and clean calm streets. No beggars!
My Dutch and French seems to be completely different totheirs, at least the Dutch accent was unbearable - I got around with French. After quite some hassle I found Thomas and after a short visit of the city we went to Ghent. This turned out to be like lueneburg just a different epoch. Young people, awesome restaurants and a decent cuteness. But a beauty coupled with everyday life. Brugge however turned put to be to cute to bear without lol. My god this city consists of chocolate, belgian "spitze", jewellery and souvenir stores as well as cute houses and fat americans eating ice cream. After 2 days this city was annoying with its cuteness and we decided to spend the rest of the time drinking sangria and watching fat Americans in the paardentram. But all in all it was a wonderful time. And not too fast, I am still struggling with the acclimatization, unfriendly people and the damn speed and lack of tolerance. People here need to sit and stare, take some time to understand and reconsider. Maybe discuss the small irrelevant things to understand the big relevant issues in life.
I learnt to enjoy busrides and their trancelike 6-10h of thinking with the wind blowing through my hair. I never had so much time for myself and my thoughts. I will miss life in India.

India as a single woman

This is an entry for every woman, thinking of travelling to South India herself. First of all, if you are not strong and self-conscious, don't do it, unless you have friends. You will, this is for certain, have situations where you will need all the strength you have. There are different degrees of harassment that might occur, the simple and merely annoying one, is the teasing of boys. Indian boys consider teasing girls as a sport. If a boy/man on the street greets you or tries to talk to you, give him the most arrogant smile you can imagine and look away. Don't tell them your name, this is none of their business. That's what Indian girls do as well. Don't go out for drinks with a man, unless you know his intentions and agree with them. Going out for drinks might implicate that you are open for more.

Second degree harassment is the touching in crowds, busses queues. If something like that happens, turn around slap him, best case with your left slipper, in the face. Make it a social matter, Tamil people like other people's affairs and they will all, all start yelling at that guy.

Third degree harassment is guys trying to enforce their sexual dreams. Don't go out on your own when its dark, after 7 pm. Don't trust anyone, an Indian man once said that it is safe to assume that every Indian man either wants sex or money.

Now, with bad internet connections my tips/tricks list got deleted. Whatever, I will do it later.

Bangalore

What a city. Whatever I have seen in India, this is the best city ever. Here are the reasons why:

1. The climate is moderate and doesn't change much during the year. Now in monsoon season it rains, sure, but not as much.
2. One can buy alcohol
3. they have bars, european style, where I, as a woman, can enter on my own
4. people hold hands in public
5. there are at least 2 huge parks in the middle of the, admittedly congested, city. The air is therefore a lot better
6. Shopping is a dream, especially with the Euro/Rupie conversion rates
7. its still Indian, with meals places, street vendors, vegetarian places etc.
8. everyone speaks English. It is a multi"state"/national city, people prefer to communicate in Hindi
9. they have a huge IT sector ;) which is highly respected (because they earn insane amounts of money). people understand me when I talk about what I do!
10. Girls wear western clothes and smoke publicly. I was only being teased one night, but I waited for a friend in a spot where you shouldn't be.
11. Its still India, with all its chaos, bargaining and flexibility.

Honestly, this city tempts. Maybe in a couple of years...

Last days at SUEB

Even though its my last day in general, I would like to keep you up to date with what happened after Kodaikanal. The hiking trip down to the valley was crazy by the way, especially because I entered the town and directly took the overnight bus back to Chennai.

Anyway, my last days at SUEB were wonderful. I realised how much they learnt, how they started to communicate with me and I didn't need a Tamil translator in the class at all. If there was a problematic word, we just looked it up or somehow described it. And my self-defense class was great as well, I couldn't teach much (well, I don't really have the qualification to really teach a lot), but they learnt basic things, be it just to show self-confidence and how to deal with a man that harasses them. Oh, and the boss of this SUEB branch gra, he made me (and other people) so angry by saying that the Tamil culture of respecting a woman makes sure that there are no rape cases, especially not within the families. That just doesn't exist. Also, its girls own fault if something happens, they just shouldn't be in dangerous situations. Nice, hu? In Bangalore, I met another woman, the wife of an uncle of a friend, she did the first study (1994) on rape and molestation in India and she has other numbers than 0%, basically the same we have in Europe, I would say. I will therefore make sure he has this study. As soon as I have it I will certainly link it.

The goodbye was hard. I made very dear friends among my collegues. One of them said, "I will remember you because you talked to everyone and had lunch with the stuff and not with [the boss]." Well, would you say no if your collegues would stuff you with homemade Indian vegetarian food? And one of my students, so cute, ran after me and pressed her earrings in my hand, she wanted me to have something to remember her.

Friday I left for Bangalore!

Kodaikanal and back

2.5 days of Kodaikanal. It is just a wonderful place, but of course a total tourist rip off place --- but here it is mainly Indian tourists that pay insane amounts of money. Normaly, one easily finds a place for 300-400 rupies, decent, clean but not necessarily western toilets. In Kodaikanal, the cheapest was 500, a dark humid dirty room. Everything else was above 700. Even dinner, you easily pay more than 100 rupies. Well, once in a while this is affordable ;).

Saturday we, Bec, Delia and me, had a girls day. In the cool and fresh air of 2000m I could finally consume 3 meals a day and even finish them. And.... Kodaikanal is famous for chocolate and Tibetian food. So our day consisted of walking, eating, chocolate and eating. At night we wanted to find a bar, but there was no suitable bar for girls. So, we had rum and raisin chocolate, watching a thunderstorm in the valley. The night in the dorm was terrible with 5 boys tripping on the other thing Kodai is famous for: mushrooms. They were constantly yelling: "My momomomo-moments." Momo is a delicious Tibetian dish, at least they had a nice trip ;).

Anyway, the lack of sleep really made us vulnerable to what happened the next day: we hiked down from 2000m to 400m in the valley, with a group of Bangalore guys and a guide. It is Tuesday now and I can still not really walk stairs. In the middle of our walk we had an insane rain and only the left-over organized German in me had a waterproof backpack --- everything outside was soaked! The hike started to be really difficult, with the stones and so on being really wet. Sometimes I thought that it was quite dangerous as well but I didn't want to

say anything, it was enough that I had an internal panic and I didn't want Bec to panic as well. The boys, being cricket players, did a good job helping us from time to time over really slippery stones.

Anyway, we arrived in the valley at around 5-5:30pm. Totally exhausted, even the boys. I shared my leftover momos and everyone else just had cookies, so I was sooooooooo hungry. But except for a peanut store, there was nothing. We ended up in the district city, our guide promised to organize our busses, mine back to Chennai and Bec to Tiruvenelli. He didn't really, but he helped organizing one -- which entailed something I am NOT proud of. I bribed this damn bus driver to let me in his bus. He promised a special seat: the only one that didn't move back, close to the Bollywood blasting TV and the half deaf conductor yelling to the bus driver. Sleep was impossible. I arrived in Chennai at 5:45, went to Nita and didn't wake her up (thank god her watchman knows me) and then fell unconscious on her couch. The rest of the day I was in some kind of trance, teaching very unprepared but still enjoying it, having a great time with my collegues...

Teaching in India

As far as I remember, in Germany teachers are well paid, but not respected. In India, this is the other way round. Here, the teacher is the God and what (s)he says is being done. When I enter the class room, with a bright "Good afternoon, boys and girls", everyone jumps up and shouts either "Good evening Ma'am" or "Good evening, Miss". I tried to teach them that I am "Miss!" because I am unmarried, but they have a hard time accepting it. Whenever someone is being called, they jump up. With our new chairs this causes problems, they have a little table attached, so when they jump up, the whole chair joins this procedure and its hard to understand the answer in the general rattleing of the chair falling down (including pen and exercise book). So, I introduced the system of general respect without standing up. Every unasked chat is being punished by a "Frau Peetz" stare with my bright blue eyes. If this doesn't suffice, a HUSH works. My collegues even use their mobiles in class, sending mails, walking out for a call. But I have some dignity left. Ooooh and you would not believe how much I love teaching. The very first time in my life I have the feeling I am changing something, I am teaching those hungry little kids something. If it wouldn't be paid so badly, I would love to stay for a whole year teaching them until their exams. It is such a pleasure to see how they learn, how knowledge emerges and how they soak up information. The reward might not be immediate, but even after 2 weeks I can hear/see/feel that there is an improvement. One girls tries to speak like I do, and I can see her lips moving and repeating every word I say. One of the boys even started to show up regularly. Yesterday, one of the girls came: "Miss. Please, I want to learn English. Teach me more." So, I will offer an additional class in their lunchtime, whoever wants to come. One other girl said, "oooh you not here tomorrow [today], class will bore."
Next week I am going to teach self-defense. Girls and women only, my collegues are very eager to join. I will not be able to do much in an hour, but still I can teach them self-confidence and where the balls are ;). The boys will be taught by Livingston, how to be a good husband ;).

Kodaikanal

Hello my dear readers,
I have been kind of busy with teaching and life and reconsidering everything I do and where I stand. Somehow, this country with all its contrasts touches me, wakes me up from a long, long sleep. I will talk to all of you later, tell you about it.
Right now I am in Kodaikanal, for hiking and escaping the smog/dirt/pollution of Chennai. A wonderful calm place with many tourists. I immidiately found someone to cling to, as I said, I had bad experiences and travelling on my own all the time is something that scares me a little by now. Tomorrow Bec will come and we will talk about teaching :). Like my parents, meeting other teachers, talking about school...
The last days after work I was invited for dinner, as contrasting as it can be. One night by a collegue, a social worker. Living together with her husband and useless son in 2 rooms, no shower, handwashing outside. Food was delicious, though and I didn't get sick. They tried to make me find a job for their son in tourism, in a hotel in Germany. Trying to tell them that I don't have any connections and I don't know anyone there didn't work out ;). At the end I left, but not without their son trying to convince me to go to the movies with him. And we all know how this ends....

However, the next day, I went out with Kish. We had a wonderful evening in one of the fancier bars in Chennai. Drinking cocktails, wearing cloths that show shoulders, watching embracing Indians and drunken British old guys (they haunt me, they are everywhere). Yesterday I spent with Nitas grandma, cooking and then went shopping for make-up. Girls, tell me if you need something. The stuff here is HIGH quality and still very affordable. Also, contact lenses! Jessie, if you want me to get you a pack of your contact lenses, just write me a mail with the details.

Then I took the overnight train to Kodaikanal and here I am. Wonderful place.

Short update

Sorry, I couldn't write that much lately. I've been basically teaching last week, in Chennai, in a community college. Wonderful experience. At night, I met really cool people -- Nita is really taking care of me. Haha, I actually had a date with a movie star. Everyone knows him and his family, just I didn't. We were pretty funny, white girl being stared at and him :). Chennai isn't too bad, actually, you really have to find the nice places. Today, I went to Church. Yes, me. Wonderful experience -- it is a lot nicer over here than at home. And then we went shopping! I spent maybe 40 Euro for so many nice clothes.
Otherwise, I will blog about the school system as soon as possible!
Aaah, and for the interested people: check out Madras Contemporary Art. A mix of old, traditional South Indian Art and Modern Art. It is soooooooo beautiful. I was honestly thinking of buying the "Blind Poet and Butterfly" by C. Douglas.
Thats all for now -- I gotta sleep, have to teach tomorrow ;).

Nature and Spices

I finally did what I was yearning to do: I went to Kumily, the town of spices, tigers and elephants. Yesterday I spent a wonderful day hiking, safariing and rafting in the natural reserve. I saw elephants, bisons, deer, HUGE squirrels, makkaken monkeys in different varieties and a cobra. The cobra was a baby cobra and the boys I am travelling with didn't know that it is a poisonous viper and played with it -- later the guide told us that a bite would have killed us: if the antidote is injected within 3 hours its not problem, but we were 1.5 hours away from civilization and again at least 1-2 hours from the next hospital. Due to monsoon season there were massive amounts of leeches, without salt and protection gear we would now be aneamic.
At the end of the day we reached a little waterfall, and well, you know me, I just needed to climb up. Otherwise I would have regretted it badly --- the way up and down wasn't a problem until the last step where I glid away and twisted my ankle. Yippie, thank god I just had to limp to our raft 10meters away. I can now proudly present a list of diseases I accumulated in India: Stomach problems, twisted ankle, a badly infected mosquito bite, a pretty horrible bout of psora, a cold (I didn't know my fancy room in Varkala had A/C) and an athlete's foot (according to leo this is the translation of Fusspilz: it is supposed to be common in tropical countries). But: I am having the best time of my life!

This morning I went to a spice garden, a third generation spice grower. He showed me all the spices, how they are prepared etc. It was terribly interesting and tasty: fresh fruits from the tree as well as freshly created Jackfruit crisps. Yum! Whenever you come to Kumily: Abrahams Spices is the place to go. He knows all the names in English, French and German, I have to admit that I didn't even know some of the German terms (though I knew them in English). I wanted to go to the tea factory, but its sunday and the commune doesn't work on sundays -- how dare they ;). Later, I will be leaving for Chennai to do the social part of my journey.

Means of transport (MoT)

1. Feet: Within the cities, between the sights, it is often not worth taking a riksha. However, some rules should be obeyed. First of all, don't rely on traffic lights when you cross the streets, neither on marked crossings. Second, you are used to left-right-left looking for the traffic, continue that until infinity, unless you have 3 turns in a row without one of the following MoT driving on the lane you want to cross. This brings me to the third point, have subgoals, one lane at a time, reach for islands they are valuable. Do not let yourself distract from the constant , unless it is longer than one second but then it is too late anyway. Rejoice each street you cross without being killed. Finally, try to ignore people trying to sell you something, with a joyfull "thank you", but don't smile at the boys around you (see prev. entries), if the sellers are to annoying, don't be joyful but grumpy, same goes for the beggers. Don't give ANY money to kids, EVER. They will not go to school, unless the will earn less, so keep your small change for the old ladies without a pension fund.
   
2. Bike: I distinguish 3 kinds of bike: a real motorbike, a bicycle and a scooter. The scooter is real fun, you can rent them for between 200-300 Rp a day and stroll along the streets through the villages. Today, we did a wonderful trip along the shore in Verkala, trying to find a fortress. You have to drive VERY carefully, honestly, there are bumps everywhere and with the monsoon there are puddles you shouldn't drive through too quickly. And yes, Mum, I had a helmet. The motorbike option is of course the coolest of all. Chennai is famous for the Ensfield machines... Anyway, they just introduced that helmets are obligatory, but hardly anyone cares: the girls need to at least have a chance to look at the boys with those amazing machines (that is what the boys think), covering the face with a helmet would be so stupid. Admittedly, it is so damn hot in this helmet! Bicycles: the bakfiets was definetly not invented in the Netherlands. I have seen some of them here, that are at least as old as the greek mythology but still work perfectly. You can transport about 50 huge bags of rice on them... Otherwise, biking is similar to A'dam. Same chaos, same bell ringing, same amount of people on the bike. I didn't try them yet, they are supposed to have no suspension at all.
   
3. Bike Rikscha: Cheaper than a Moto, this MoT has a very old driver and vehicle. The driver is really old, seriously, at home they would be sent to a retierement home. However, they take a long time and the whole time you feel sorry for that poor man, who in that unbearable heat has to transport you and your enormous backpack to your hostel. Sometimes they stop and chat (not asking for the way, but actually chatting), but they are greener and somewhat authentic.
   
4. Moto Rikscha: You have to take one at least once a day. They are quick and often cheap, unless they realise you are a tourist. There are no traffic rules for rikshas, they have nice manual horn, and a meter, which seriously needs to be dusted. Prices have to be bargained before: the best strategy is to somehow have an idea how much it should cost and walk away if the price is not alright. In Chennai, you should not take a normal but a prepaid riksha (so I heard) because they rob you otherwise. Though I have not a clue how to distinguish them. Also, if they want more money afterwards, don't give them anything, not even tips. They should learn that they can not take everything from the tourists. Finally, prices vary from place to place, Ponticherry has a minimum of 30 Rp, here in Verkala its 20.
   
5. Air conditioned taxi: No idea, but the drivers constantly ask me whether I am interested...
   
6. Goverment Bus: For long distances point 4 and 5 are too expensive. Goverment busses are the cheapest way, but not necessarily comfortable. They always cost below 100 Rp, for my 10h trip I paid in total less than 100Rp. However, there are disadvantages, if you get a seat, you might end up between a rosary praying egocentric money-begging old woman and a woman with a newborn (which actually ended up peeing on my trousers, after I still had 6 h of travelling ahead). You will not sit next to a nice person of the opposite gender, unless he is a tourist, because that is what you don't do. Just a social rule. In Tamil Nadu, make sure you don't sit in the first 3 rows of the large seats, they are a lot less comfy than the rest.
   
7. Private Bus: Never did that, but they are air-conditioned, more expensive and have to be booked in advance
   
8. Train, sleeper class: The trains stink. It is hard to explain what the smell is, but in general I would say it is toilet smell. I slept in a sleeper class train, you basically have a normal train, not really compartments, and like in the German City Night lines, the lowest bed is a seat, the middle bed is to lean and the topmost bed is already open. At one point someone will come and ask if you would like to order some food, don't do it, its terrible. Just rush out at a station and get some cheaper and better street vendor food, or buy food from the guys that sell snacks in the train. Sleeping is possible, believe it or not, at around 10 everyone goes to bed, lights are turned of and no one talks anymore. Bring your own blanket(should you need one)/pillow. The doors are always open and people look out of the train.
   
9. Train, second class: Stinks as well, but sleeping is not that easy. One can very well sleep in the luggage carrying metal shelves, but I think that its very uncomfy, I didn't do it. Otherwise, its the same as 8.
   

How to find/have a girlfriend even though it is socially not accepted

It is fascinating how the role of new media can change a society. Apart from what we saw what happens in Iran, it shapes the young people in India as well.
Facebook seems to have major role in establishing first contact, merging cybercontacts with reality. This does actually support my idea that online friendship and peergroups are totally acceptable and one (especially generation 30+) should never forget that this is very often as real. After meeting the opposite gender, there is this hurdle that you are not supposed to even hold hands in public. So, people make out in cinemas and... internet cafes as they have wonderful screens at the side. I am actually sitting inside one compartement and it would be pretty cosy with Thomas ;).
Also, sleeping over is nearly impossible; students often still live at their parents place, if not, the landlords kick would kick you out if they would find out. Then there are the lodges (I am residing in places like that). Still they don't allways allow people to go there unmarried ("You are a student behave like a student", funny how the view of how a student should be is different all over the world...).
When girls go clubbing, they have to wear their overcoat until they are inside and then take it off.
I am wondering, dear Sara, is this similar to what happens in Iran?

Ponticherry, Auroville, Chennai, Kanyakumari

I didn't blog for quite some time, but here is my update.
First of all, let me tell you about the most interesting day I had until now. The day began with a wonderful breakfast in Ponticherry, at one of the places owned by an american woman. An Indian person Bec and I met the night before, let us call this person S., had his coming-out, apparently he trusted us enough to tell us his life story. To respect S. privacy, all I say is, that there is still so much to do about this India. Sure, by now homosexuality is not illegal anymore, but still coming from an "influential family" means that there is no chance to ever live a normal (homosexual) life in India. The psychological problems that occur are terrible and a disgrace for this society. In India all religions are tolerated without the problems we know in Europe, but homosexuality is still a taboo. Let us hope that this changes within the following years.

Afterwards Bec and I went to Auroville again, to see a respected Ayurvedic Practioner. I was amazed how much he knew about my personal health problems just by feeling my pulse. The place where he has his "office" and homestays is a paradise. They have a wonderful garden with all the ayurvedic herbs, a little hut to cook food and two beautiful rooms. The accomodation and one week "stress-relief" on the basis of ayurvedic medicine is rather cheap and the way it looks it sounds like it is worth going there. We then walked through Auroville and met a cute and clever 15 yr old boy who showed us an incredible place on a water tower, we could oversee all of Auroville, until the beach. He told us that when the (apparently an earlier one) Tsunami came, all boys met up on the tower to watch the big wave.

The next morning I got up very early to take the bus to Gingee, a wonderful place for someone who likes ruins as much as I do. I walked up a very steep hill (look at the pictures google image search returns) and had the most wonderful overview over the region. You could see the leftovers of the walls of that fortress between the green rice paddies and the surrounding hills, each blessed with another part of the fortress on the top. There I met Anant, he looked as foreign as I did: the only person with a helmet to ride his bike ;). We met up later on in Ponticherry, sitting on the beach and talking about cultural differences, and I could really feel the differences between the poor people and people from the middle class, like him. Everyone stating that the castes do not exist anymore is a lier.
The next day I agreed to come to Chennai to see the nice parts of the city, apparently there is a clubbing culture and so on... This wouldn't be too bad for my travel plans, as Chennai has overnight train connections to most of South India. However, everything got messed up, a little misunderstanding, an empty cell phone and a motorbike accident: and Hendrike alone in this huuuuuuge and scary city. I was so lonely and homesick as I have never been before. I checked into an overpriced but nice hostel and went to the train station to buy a ticket for the night train to Kanyakumari. Thank god, Anant saved me from a major depression; we finally established contact and met up. Too late for going out we had a nice chat with his friends (who knew some German without ever having spoken to one ;). I think I found a really good friend in Anant. Apparently he doesn't consider Chennai as huge as I do --- coming from Dehli this is understandable.
Yesterday, I met a wonderful woman, a close friend of Anant, Nita. She had cornflakes and fruits -- the best breakfast in a long time. We talked for hours about everything. She works for an NGO and asked me whether I would like to spend a week or two in a town/village, teaching in a local school. Considering that I will have no better chance to understand the people, I am inclined to do so. And isn't it a nice feeling to do something good? We had lunch at Subways -- that was great, I didn't expect to miss western food after only 11 days. Later, I took the train to Kanyakumari and here I am. A terrible place, just created to fullfill the needs of tourists and pilgrims. Tomorrow I am going to hike up a holy mountain (holy because it is full of medicinal herbs and some god of the extensive pantheon has been saved by the herbs).

Ponticherry

I finally made it out of my little homey place in M. and am now sitting the yuppiest place in India, a coffee shop you could also find in Berlin, Sandwiches, clean toilets etc. I am a spoiled brat and seriously, I take every European toilet I can get. India really makes me appreciate what I have in Europe.

First some information, Saturday night Fabienne, Sandra and I were invited to a place of one of the shop owners. He cooked Kashmerian food, 3 nice (1 non-veg) curries with rice. Funny enough, one of the curries was close to a bechamel sauce, very tasty and good for my still slightly upset stomach. We talked for hours about dating behaviour, sex, food, India, Kashmir, love... It was wonderful. Ahh, that afternoon I watched Gopi carve one of his wonderful thumbnail sized elefants, he has a real talent (actually I only half watched it, because I felt sick).
The next day I left to Ponticherry and had one of the coolest bus trips ever: old Indian goverment busses, wind streaming through your hair and touching your face and listening to Static-X. It was very intense and the contrast between Europe and India could larger hardly be, my eyes saw lower caste people working in the coconut farms and rice paddys, my ears filled with home.

I then arrived in P., and had a bike rikscha bringing me to the lodge. Please don't imagine a bike rikscha to be any similar to those in A'dam! First of all, it is not a good looking guys in the mid-twenties, but an old man. Further, the riksha is older than the old man. Second, it is damn slow, especially because the man stopped in between to have a chat ;). My hostel was a normal low budget lodge, Indian style toilets, but "real" shower, but a double room.

Walking along in P. later, I had the funniest question ever, mirrowing the holywood-based view of westerners: " Is it common to have sex in Europe." I thought he meant homosexual sex, but he actual asked me this question, not even knowing my name. I answered that you have to be married and that I am married and left.

Later I met Bec, an Aussi girl, and Wilson, an guy from Kerala who is working here. He had a guest pass for Auroville (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Auroville ), so we went and had dinner there and spent an amazing evening with loads of inside Auroville stories. This place doesn't seem so perfect to me as it orignially did. He was the only properly paid Indian there, the first one. It is some kind of "New Age Colonialism". "Natives" only work lower jobs in the farm land, mostly servant like jobs, whereas the others try to be enlightend. There have even been child abuse cases, Colonial to Indian. I am very disappointed.

Anyway, this morning we met another girl, from Palo Alto, and had a girls day. My wound and my stomach are a lot better now, but this mornign I was desperately searching for a pharmacy, because my open mosquito bite (I know I shouldn't itch) was so infected that my angle looked like twisted. I am now on antibiotics, you can buy them freely here, for 26 Rupees, 5 days...
Afterwards we had a trip to Auroville again looking at the "temple", as the Indian call it, but they also call a church temple, the Matrimandir and some other Aurostuff.

Unfortunately, I can not upload photos -- no card readers, I will add them later.

I am going to dedicate this blog entry to something I really hate and that really bothered me. Before I am ravaging, two statements: Indian boys/men get married when they are 25-28, and they are not supposed to have sex until then, which worked pretty well for the last centuries. The caste system and the skin color often correspond, the darker the skin, the lower the caste (the social rank).
Now my observations.
On my second day, I found a nice little place, called Rose Corner, where all the young people hang out, of course only the boys, girls don't do that kind of stuff. Except when they are backpackers. I met two backpacker girls heavily involved in an affair [addition: with local boys], embracing in a way that would not even seem decent in Europe. I just thought, wow, ok, that is fine, why not. We had a nice time, later J. (no clue how to spell the name) invited me to a dinner in his cafe (coconut rice with fresh butter*something* fish in garlic coriander sauce). Afterwards we had some beer and fresh pineapple juice with terrible rum and talked. I made sure-sure that he knows about Thomas! Later he asked me whether I want to join the group to the beach and I agreed. Stupid me. Well, you can imagine that he was not amused when I ran away half an hour later.
The next day, I had a wonderful time with the local boys, laughing, talking, drinking beer (later more about alcohol), but I realised more and more, how they thought I was eager to start an affair/wanted sex etc. I was really confused, and invented wonderful and elaborate wedding plans. Anyway, things cleared up a little, when I saw this rather big, old French woman with a 20 yr old, paying everything and kissing. Even more, when Sandra (one of the French women) went to the beach in t-shirt and long hotpants got touched on the butt by a 12 yr old. Things cleared up even more the next day when I talked to older local people.
The boys are eager to have sex and they are mostly from the lowest caste, the untouchables. Apparently, in touristy areas (like here and other places) there are many, many women coming on their own or with a friend and take their lover for a week or so. They then pay the boys all they want for a week, providing them with luxury they normally don't have (sometimes even promise them to marry, but the boys know very well about the sincerity..). It's off-season, but normally you can see 70 yr old women with a 20 yr old, you can see wifes that come with their husband and just vanish for an hour etc. It is basically Puket reversed.
With this development (it started only several years ago), those western women bring HIV and other stuff, the boys of course don't want to use a condom and as they usually tell the women that they never have sex... Indian people don't want to test themselves either. So finally, when the family manages to get the boy married, his poor, poor innocent Indian wife and the kids get ill, without knowing it. That way, the HIV rate in India increased like hell over the last years, especially in the touristy places. And that way, I am not supposed to smile at any boy when I am alone, as smiling here means: Hey I am interested, wanna marry me? For western women it is understood as: Hey I am interested, wanna fuck me?
The conclusion of this post: If you are a girl and you would like to have a week with one of the admittedly really handsome boys, come here, but please, please, please, for the sake of the Indian women and the children: use condoms.
Otherwise, don't be surprised if you will have avances, they don't harm you, in my experience the guys are horny but would never try to rape you or so.

Things I did

I am still in Mamallapuram, but I'll leave tomorrow, because it is independence day and therefore a big party. The last days I did some interesting things, visiting temples: old and new; working in a local restaurant, trying to influence the service with my german way of organization (didn't work out, but it was an amazing way to earn my dinner), ascending (and descending) 550 steps barefooted in midday sun, having some kind of meditation and talking to the Hindu monks, having a BBQ, talking to local people and discovering their way of life (later more). Ahh, and I had my first stomach problems.

What cultural shock really means....

The flight and everything was great. Even the food on the airplane was really nice, giving me a taste of what to expect within the next few weeks. The plane and the airport were (of course) airconditioned, however the city of Chennai is not. So, after finding my way out of the airport (they check for weapons when you LEAVE the plane...), I had a big shock. Damn it, it was 12:30 and hotter than in Berlin during the daytime (or hotter than Amsterdam could ever be). There was then a huge crowd of Rikscha/Taxi Guys around me trying to convice me to take theirs. With a little bit of bargaining I made a (what I thought) good price and sat down in this machine of doom. Even though it was night, I had a good impression of how driving goes and I saw a first glimpse of the Indian streets. It is amazing how real poverty, so people sleeping on what might be called pavement, goes together with huge buildings where the richer people live. And the smell of Chennai (which is terribly polluted) was amazing. I never smelled so many different and distinct versions of stink. However, I got to my hostel in a very stinky (maybe a mixture of dead dog and general pollution) area and survived a trip of doom. There was a boy (11-13yrs) sleeping in the reception area under the fan. The hostel had an elevator, but Indian style toilets (a little bit like the French toilets were 10 yrs ago, just that you have to use a bucket to flush). A gecko on the wall greeted me, a big fat mosquito was eagerly awaiting my blood and the bed sheets were, mmh, blood stained. After a little hassle with the mosquito net (Jessie, you said there will always be a way to fix it!) I went to bed in my own bedsheets. The next morning I got up at seven, I couldn't sleep anyway because it was too hot and I was scared of whatever caused the bloodstains in the bed.
I then tried to find a nice place to have breakfast, but it was terrible. Garbage everywhere, poor people, dogs and cats with undefinable diseases. So I just had a chai at some chai place and bought water --- I was scared to develop a brain area just dedicated to stink. Also, I couldn't stand Chennai this extreme poverty anymore and I was just overwhelmed. I then took a bus to Mamallapuram (be it MP), a very touristy but nice place. In the bus (believe it or not) I could finally sleep (crawled around my luggage), unfortunately I therefore couldn't see much of the landscape. Ahh, before I had some steamed rice paddies with different sauces at the railway station. I went for an Indian fast-food chain --- I thought this would be the savest way.
In MP I met two French women with quite a big deal of travel experience. We went to a French restaurant to have lunch, moderately spiced prawn curry, and they asked for some assistance finding a place to sleep. We went around and found a very nice place directly at the beach (for people in future: Hotel Daphne). I can jump out of the room directly into the water and see the shore temple. On the beach you can see the fisherboats, this town has masses of weird for me unknown fishes. I am still kind of scared to eat them though, I don't want to upset my stomach. Some local boys helped us to get the luggage on a motorbike, yes it was an Ensfield.
After a long, long shower we strolled through the town. It is unbelievable how people live. You walk along there, you see garbage beeing thrown on the "pavement", millions of flies around it and next it someone cooks some food. The huge amount of people trying to sell something to you is amazing as well, but you kind of get used to it.
On our hunt for a cold beer, we ended up in a cozy roof top restaurant. One woman, she helped Sandra to clean her scarf before, had a very proud manner. She told us that the guy serving us was actually her only son and he goes to the university, he was presented to us like a piece of jewllery :).
Afterwards we found a place where they sell brandy, rum and related things. This stuff is dead cheap... We then went to another French/Indian restaurant and had amazing food, again. I can drink masses of juice: fresh papaya, pineapple... Mmmh, or papaya lassi. Afterwards we had some of the brandy with the local boys. Mixed with pineapple juice it gives a very good digestive.
I then went to ebd and slept 11 hours. This morning, I woke up, put on my swimsuit and jumped into the waves! Wow, what a way to wake up! Strolled around, had lunch with another backpacker (half Indian, though), met Sedil, who tried to make me drink Brandy/Sprite at 1pm. Apart from the fact that what they call brandy is some kind of weird cheap stuff that gives instant headache, HOW can you drink at 1pm, when you have 40$\circ$ outside.
Anyway, I talked to the boys in their cafe, had one bite of their fastfood (callecd drumstick but is veg.) burned my mouth, drank water, died, drank water, died a little less, but still, drank water.
Later I'll do some sight-seeing.
I am still uncapable to write about all these impressions, give me some time to acclimatize and you will get more impressions instead of pure facts.

Berlin

I finally decided to write a blog about my trip to India, Belgium, Ireland and wherever I am flowing to. I will start with Berlin, my time at home was pretty unspectacular and nice.

I stay with my dear Jessie in the heart of the Prenzlauer Berg. I am not really in the mood to do sightseeing, but I like just LOVE the nightlife... Thursday we went out for dinner (Berlin is so affordable), afterwards spent some time at some Beach bar, listening to Salsa grooves.

The next day we had a prototypical Berlin night. First some cocktails in the Simon-Dachs-Str, later we went to a 90's party. I remember how we made fun of the guys at 80's partys, now I am not any better --- we left around 6 or so, ended up at the club der visionaere, went to bed at 8 or so.
The afternoon I went to the weissen see with Vinz, drinking beer on a paddleboat, in the middle of the lake, with the sun tickleing our skin.

Yestday Jessie and I met up with Wendy, sitting in the park, girls giggling, talking and realising how much I missed them. I am really excited that Wendy starts her phd position in Osnabrueck, between Amsterdam and Berlin!

Today we went brunching and I am playing around with Tims (Jessies flatmate) computer, installing windows and kubuntu, I forgot how much I enjoyed fiddleing ;) without a deadline. I should build my own computer again, apple problems always end up as real problems and freak me out (they usually occur 2 days before a deadline).

Anyway, tomorrow morning I will leave to India. Lets hope my hypochondric nighmares will not come true.